Such a great title, such inspiration missed! You could do so much with that, image-wise. Think Damien Hirst, jewel-encrusted million dollar skulls, ice, crystals, snow, glaciers, diamonds.
But no! The pre-movie trailer we saw was dustily predictable and tired. Looked like the same-old same-old, hat on the sandy earth, faded green jeeps and dated dry landscape backdrops.
Anyone who is an Indy enthusiast will probably be pleased to have more of the same - but surely even they will want more of a new twist than simply adding the newish face of Cate Blanchett to Harrison Ford's chiselled 'getting more distinguished by the day' features.
Directed by Steven Spielberg, one or two of the special effects might be a fun experience - such as the jeeps driving perilously close to the cliff edge, but who wrote the cheesy lines? Was it really George Lucas? 'I thought that was closer' Indy implausibly has time to say, as he swings on a rope through a jeep windscreen. Politely, his two fellow actor-drivers even wait with very bad timing for him to deliver his lines!
Do these people not realise that kids have state-of-the-art graphics on their consoles nowadays? These young consumers are too tech-savvy to fall for these old stunts and gags - and with a tale winding it's way from landscapes through New Mexico to South America, they will expect some pretty hot backdrops. What they will get is more dusty temples, caves, pillars and dark dismally unconvincing doings.
Sure, there will be some movie-goers who will look around for a kid to invite as an excuse for a wallow in adventure, popcorn and Ben and Jerry's but I suspect the impetus will be driven by nostalgic dads - not requests from the kids! Indiana Jones and The Kingdom of The Crystal Skull smells like a re-hash for old-timers - fourth, and maybe last, in the series with no new keen kids to take it forward any further.
I should know - I just invited mine. Do you want to know what two tween sons said?
"Mom, can we go see 'Speedracer?"
(image - flickr - clownfish - creative commons)