My grandmother, Maria, an Italian immigrant died on February 19, 1998, nearly ten years ago. Her face has not faded in my memory nor is it ever likely that it will.

My conversations with her, especially the ones that taught me things to use in life, I can still recite verbatim. Nearly everything I ever learned that turned out to be important in life came from her. Absolutely everything I know about real beauty came from her.  

She was two weeks from her ninetieth birthday when she died. Her skin though was somewhere between 25 and 30 nearly flawless and wrinkle-free. When I ran my hand over her cheek, the feel was like fine linen, soft as a 1000 thread count cotten sheet.and just as smooth.

Her hair, which she brushed the Victorian era requisite 100 strokes a day was tangle and split end free and flowed down past her waist,.But like many women of her era she kept it up in a bun until bedtime. Loose flowing hair was reserved for the privacy of the husband and the bedroom.

Never once did I ever see her with her hair loose, always immaculately groomed in that forever bun. Still her hair had that same quality of her skin, natural beauty.

I recalled a conversation that we had had many years earlier when I was in my twenties. She must have been in her sixties then and as I looked at her and marveled, I asked how do you do it? How do you keep your skin so beautiful?"

Her answer: "You godda cook a - da - good food wit da good ah-leve oil."

Makes sense now of course with what we now know thanks to research.

She never ate in restaurants, cooked everyday with fresh, healthy ingredients like good extra virgin olive oil, fresh garlic, fresh greens like escarole and spinach. She never bought frozen or processed food items and certainly never offered one in her home. She always made her sauce (Italian red) from scratch and only used the finest ingredients. Even when she used canned crushed tomatoes, it had to be a certain kind.

Once when grocery shopping with her, I picked up a can of crushed tomatoes that was on sale because it was dented.

"If itsa godda da bump, itsa no good," she said.

She never wore make-up, only used a little face powder now and then. And never ever sat in the sun.

After a bath, she would lightly puff her skin with Johnson's Baby Powder.

She kept it simple and for that I am grateful. I have learned, finally, to do the same as much as it is possible in today's world.

I can't always go au naturale like she did though. I wear make-up and I go to a stylist for hair color and streaks. Staying away from processing hair is next to impossible these days, but I try to be careful about the products I use.

I've followed her advice about the food that I eat more and more every year that passes. And I've found that it makes a difference with the moisture content and condition of my hair and my skin.

The one behavior I can't part with is the sun. I love to feel the sun on my face. One can compromise of course with sun blocks and such, but I don't overdue those either. Sun and vitamin D matter. Moderation is the answer, I believe.

Olive oil, or good "ah-leve" oil, is a staple in my diet and has been for 25 years.

I don't pretend that I will ever have the condition of skin and hair that she had, but I don't plan on being far off.