I say if I had to kiss this frog on my venture to Prince Charming, I’d rather be a lesbian. It’s gaping black rimmed mouth looks like it was coloured on with a sharpie - it’s freckles or warts too (what the heck are those?)

And  beside the creepy eyes? Are those cheerios? Coloured cheerios?

A wicker effin’ frog holding what appears to be a bird turd.

HA HA HA

Your Price Charming frog is presenting you with a dirty, dusty black turd. Thank you for the kiss. Here is your turd.

Note the wicker doily attached to his arse?